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Monday, April 19, 2021

Conner Barrett

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Satire: Canes4GaryJohnson student group on election: “Wait…was that today?”

The Libertarian political group on campus, Canes4GaryJohnson, has had a rough election cycle. From their loss in the UM geography tournament, to their embarrassing...

Two Cents: Last words before the election

In Two Cents, our columnists offer brief takes on current issues. With the presidential election just days away, they give their final thoughts before...

Satire: HP disguises student DJ as Marshmello according to email leak

In early October, Hurricane Productions (HP) announced that popular producer and D.J. Marshmello would headline the annual Homecoming Concert. The concert, scheduled for Thursday,...

Long-distance relationship kept alive by UM-issued HBOGo account

Many freshman students enter college entangled in long-distance relationships from back home. Long-distance relationships are often doomed by the drastic change in communication dynamic,...

Satire: Popularity of debate drinking games causes concern for student health

In anticipation for the third and final presidential debate between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton, UHealth has issued the following statement to students: “We are aware...

Trump’s ‘locker-room talk’ dismisses dangerous behavior, highlights privilege

Millions of people have seen the leaked 2005 video of presidential candidate Donald Trump bragging to TV host Billy Bush about his attempted and...

Fraternity celebrates diversity: ‘We have white guys from all over the country’

The University of Miami is well known for being one of the most diverse private research universities in the United States. Its unique geographic...

Poll confirms 10 out of 10 girls are impressed with your gym gains

The University of Miami sociology department recently conducted a poll in partnership with the Herbert Swoleness Center to test how female gym-goers feel about...

Freshman admitted from Kansas, stirring confusion on campus

In an uncharacteristic mistake, the University of Miami Office of Undergraduate Admission has accidentally admitted a student from Topeka, Kansas into the class of...

Students outraged that professor prioritizes academics over social media

History professor Neal Smith has been criticized recently for his apparent lack of concern for the social-media time commitments of students. Smith has been...

Satire: Recent graduates shocked to learn real world isn’t all about U

While University of Miami graduates tend to fare well in the workforce, many Hurricane alumni are facing shocking realities in the world outside of...
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