Confessions from a former asshole

Dear V,

I have just arrived on campus as a spring transfer student. While I am excited for my future endeavors, I feel anxious that my shitty past will somehow catch up to me. Long story short: I used to be an asshole. Any advice for someone trying to turn over a new leaf?


Former Asshole

At least you already conquered the first and most difficult step, admitting you are an asshole.

Even if remnants of your less-than-friendly past resurface, no one will even bat an eye. I think the reason most people actually come to Miami is because they want to start practicing for hell.

Becoming a better person does not mean you can just pretend you never made mistakes. Owning your insecurities or weaknesses takes all the power away from it. No one can ever use it against you if you own it.

Feigning innocence is embarrassing, so don’t even try it. A certain Cane skips around campus acting as if she’s Gen Z’s very own Elle Woods. Flaunting daddy’s money and a new shade of pink each day still won’t change the fact she cheated on her high school boyfriend after his mom died.

Regardless of this otherwise unforgivable behavior, I stand by the fact that everyone deserves a second chance.

I myself have had to work through some asshole-ish tendencies. Living in Miami seems to inflate the ego, regardless if it is warranted. For example, Kim Kardashian is from Miami. Actually – I don’t know if that’s true or not but she’s awful so she must be.

Acknowledging your past bad behaviors will help you identify them if you happen to relapse. Then you can take the appropriate steps to handle the situation, including genuine apologies and mature communication.

Don’t waste your time feeling guilty about a past version of yourself. Most times when an individual lashes out, they are doing so in response to their own insecurities. The Counseling Center provides multiple resources to help work through these issues, and I encourage you to take advantage.