V's Take

To breakup or not breakup?

Dear V,

I’m a senior and my girlfriend is a sophomore. Although we’ve been dating for a year and I really like her, we’ve been fighting nonstop lately. The problem is that she’s returning to UM next fall, but I’m hoping to be in law school somewhere far away from here, maybe in California. Neither of us wants to do long distance and she said she’d rather break up than even try. She really wants me to go to UM’s law school, but I kind of hate Miami and was looking forward to a change of pace. Plus, I feel like there are better internship and job opportunities in other cities. So, what should I chose: my relationship or my career?

Dear Reader,

This one’s easy: dump her!! If you’re not in love enough to (at least try to) make long distance work, then you’re probably not all the way in love. You’ve agreed that it’s not even worth attempting, so neither of you are all in. If you were really soul mates, you’d do anything to keep her in your life, even if that means weekly sessions of FaceTime sex in lieu of actual human touch. I know long distance is hard, but the effort would be worth it for the right person.

And your relationship is probably destined to fail anyways, because your priorities are so different. She’s expecting you to put your dreams on hold for her, and that’s not fair. Do yourself a favor and put your goals first. You’re not doing it in a selfish way, just in a “I don’t want to miss out on this dope opportunity and be crippled with regret for the rest of my life” kind of way. You know, that classic dilemma.

Don’t be mean; you can let her down easy. But don’t make the mistake of choosing a relationship over yourself. Take my advice and you’ll thank yourself (and me) in 10 years. I’ll be waiting for a thank-you note in the mail (if mail is still a thing in 10 years).

Love,

V

April 1, 2019

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