Lately, my boyfriend has picked up an interesting hobby – one that I wouldn’t expect, given he’s on the football team and is in a frat – he started wearing makeup.
At first, it was a joke. He had a zit one day, so I taught him how to cover it up with a bit of concealer. He had too much fun, though, saying he was going to try putting on a face in the morning like I do.
I didn’t take him seriously until he showed up at my parents’ house for dinner with his whole face done: mascara, penciled brows, powder and all.
My boyfriend doesn’t understand why I’m upset. He says makeup has nothing to do with his sexuality. Maybe I’m shallow, but I’m not used to guys getting all dolled up.
Should I try to talk him out of his new look or just deal with it?
Dude Looks Like a Lady
Dear Dude Looks Like a Lady,
Like your mother probably said when you first started wearing black skinny jeans and lime-green eyeliner in middle school, hopefully this is “just a phase.” And just like your scene, emo or goth phase in middle school, the people around your boyfriend are suffering a case of second-hand embarrassment.
Sure, you want to support your boyfriend and whatever makes him happy, but you’ve also got to worry about how what he does affects you. After all, it probably wasn’t easy to explain to your parents that you accidentally woke a sleeping beauty in him. A YouTube tutorial-filming beauty guru, that is.
It’s just like if he was covered in tribal tattoos head-to-toe or if he had dyed his hair pink and purple. It’s just self-expression and it’s no biggie, but it’s still difficult not to take people’s comments and side-eye to heart.
There’s nothing wrong with a guy wearing makeup. That’s the truth. If girls can use it to their advantage, why not let guys? A little Revlon never hurt nobody.
That said, in this day and age, people will still judge your guy for his glitz and glamour. You have to either choose to be a ride-or-die girlfriend and beat your face along with him, or get off the beauty bus.
It’s not fair to try to change him or stop him from doing something he enjoys. However, it’s also not fair for him to expect you to stick around if he does something that really bothers you.
Either let your beau bask in his cake-faced glory or hit the road. The choice is up to you.
You might want to hide your makeup bag from now on. Swiper no swipey.