V's Take

Dear V: Lighting up instead of hooking up…

V,

My boyfriend and I both smoke weed. I don’t like it as much as he does so I only smoke once every few weeks. He’s been known to get high almost every day, and he smokes a lot more now than he used to when we first started dating. Normally, this wouldn’t bother me. However, recently, his sex drive has plummeted. We have sex at most once a week. It’s just not enough for me. I’m starting to get upset. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Mary Jane

Dear Mary Jane,

If your boyfriend was a casual stoner before, the shift to smoking daily isn’t just your man emulating Snoop Dogg – he’s probably trying to cope with something.

Real life problems can’t be rolled up, lit up and puffed away. He needs to be real with you and what’s on his mind – not turn up Kid Cudi’s “Marijuana” and tune you out.

Talk to your boyfriend. Some people use drugs as an escape to avoid their emotions. You can’t possibly be upset about your GPA and student debt while watching old SpongeBob episodes and eating Cheetos.

However, this might not be the case. Maybe he just needs more weed to get the same effect as he used to.

There’s nothing wrong with a guy who loves ganja as much as he loves you, so long as he can maintain the balance. However, it sounds like he’s flubbing up his end of the deal: keeping you satisfied between the sheets.

Because weed can be known to decrease a smoker’s libido, this might be the case.

The green is making you blue.

Tell your boyfriend he needs to step up his game. Don’t be afraid to be blunt with him – after all, intimacy is a joint issue that affects both of you.

You could always try sending a text to the dealer to see what’s up. There isn’t anybody who knows your guy’s habits better than the one who’s taking his money.

Or, you could smoke with him while you have sex and see if he starts to associate sex with weed. Next time he’s rolling a joint, he’ll pull a Pavlov and want to get freaky with you. It’s a win-win, stoner style.

If all else fails, find a new beau. Don’t be with somebody who chooses a drug over you or influences you to change your own ways. What’s more, find a guy who won’t forget about giving you the TLC you need while he’s getting his fix of THC.

V

April 19, 2015

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

Deidrick Stanley had his eye on the Miami Hurricanes long before his hometown school finally offered ...

A six-pack of Hurricanes notes on a Tuesday: ▪ UM has only two Rivals.com five-star recruits on the ...

Even five months ago, it would’ve been hard to picture Jaylan Knighton winding up with the Miami Hur ...

UM offensive coordinator Dan Enos on Monday addressed the quarterback situation in this piece, culle ...

University of Florida big man Keith Stone, a 6-8 and 254-pound Deerfield Beach native, is heading cl ...

A former UM professor started a company dedicated to publishing books on African-American culture, h ...

A group of School of Architecture students visited the Caribbean nation to learn about the historic ...

Faculty with the Miller School of Medicine and Rosenstiel School of Marine and Atmospheric Science w ...

Patricia “Trish” White, dean of the School of Law, is stepping down at the end of the academic year. ...

At the annual Hug the Lake, sustainability manager Teddy Lhoutellier was honored for improving the e ...

The Hurricanes will open an eight-game homestand with a midweek matchup against crosstown FIU on Wed ...

Talking Track is a series that features current members of the Miami track and field program, while ...

The University of Miami Sports Hall of Fame announced that Trajan Bandy is the 26th recipient of the ...

Stone played in 85 career games at University of Florida. ...

The Miami women's tennis team continued its ascent up the national rankings Tuesday, moving up ...

TMH Twitter
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.