Dear V: I’ve stumbled upon sexy snaps …

V,

During a past relationship I received some nude selfies from my then partner. This fine dame kindly requested that I delete the images she sent me. I told her I would consider deleting the images. Is it weird that I do not feel morally obligated to delete the images? Should I delete the images?

Sincerely,

Pornographer

 

 

Dear Zac Efron,

 

I get the allure of nude pictures. They’re fun and exciting and they’re an easy way to get rid of your blue balls when you’re home for the break. I understand you, you and me … we’re connected on a spiritual level.

Nevertheless, have some respect for this girl and delete the pictures. The poor thing probably thinks that you’ve done it already. That she can put all her worries aside and ignore the nagging feeling in the pit of her stomach that one day she’ll be connected to an Anthony Weiner scandal.

She probably has no idea that, even when you do delete the pictures, they will be forever stored in some magical iCloud that any second-semester computer engineering student will be able to decode, bless her heart.

I don’t know if it’s weird that you don’t feel morally obligated to delete the images. You dated her and I’m assuming it was a good relationship at some point so you should at least respect her enough to delete them. Think about it this way: What if you were dating some girl and her ex still had nudes of her? You’d probably feel uncomfortable about that. I know I would.

Just think about Vanessa Hudgens and her very public lady bits. What would Jesus do?

 

V

P.S. Revenge porn is currently only illegal in the state of New York … Do with that what you will.