V.Online

V.Online: Bad lighting and worse taste

I went to the gym for the first time in eons today and I am 100 percent convinced that fluorescent lights exist for the sole purpose of making people look soft and blotchy.

I would like to point out that I’m not the fittest person on the planet but please, if a 20-something-year-old doesn’t get naked in the middle of the locker room, neither should you, grandma. Never mind the fact that your peak physical state has long since passed – you should know (from your millennia of experience) which lighting does and doesn’t suit you.

Every time Barbara Walters is on air her shot is just a teeny tiny bit out of focus. Everything is smooth, creamy and pastel-y. Why? Because Barbara knows a little something about image preservation. Get with the times, people. Unflattering pictures of anyone and everyone plague the deep (and sometimes not-so-deep), dark, corners of the Internet.

Next time it could be you.

There’s also a whole “Real Housewives of UM” thing going on in there and I really can’t deal with it. Their first world problems are too much for me to handle – I don’t think I’m ever going back.

Though whenever I need a reliable plumber I’ll know who to ask.

Until next time,

V

July 16, 2013

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


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The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.