Dear V: I want to know if my friend plays for the other team…

Dear V, 

My best friend and I have been hooking up recently whenever we are drunk together. But now I am starting to develop feelings for him. What do I do about this?

Confused Bromance


Dear Not Just Besties,

Well, first thing would be to find out if your biffle also identifies with the not-so-straight crowd. It’s going to be hard to move past just alcohol-induced third base if he’s not willing to bat for the same team when he’s sober. He might say, “Four balls? I’m walking,” and be out of there.

If you two are at least in agreement about which gender is not only fun to touch, but good to date, then it sounds like we are making some progress.

Call me stupid, but if this is your best friend, with whom I assume you often drink, and you two are getting handsy and maybe even mouthy every time you two get drunk, you guys have wiped semen off each other’s chests more than a few times.

Have you two not discussed this the days after your hookups? No “Hey bro, can we talk about last night?” Just ask him how he feels about it!

Of course, you can try to continue down the friends-with-benefits path. Keep being friends … just ones who also have a drunk liking for each other’s penises. What better than someone you can watch the game with and stroke you while you do it?

In my experience though, this is only going to further complicate things. In every FWB relationship, someone ultimately isn’t able to keep it just friends and becomes attached. It sounds like you’re already going down this sticky path.

You two really need to sit down together and stroke things out … ahem. Work things out. Continuing to loosen each other up with tequila so that you can lick the other’s salt and finish with the suck of a lime is going to ultimately ruin your friendship when someone gets emotionally hurt.

Sit down and talk it through, or just cut it out. You can trust V on this one.


It’s gay if it’s only in a two-way,