Letter to the Editor: What defines masculinity?

Dear Editor,

There have been many an occasion where I have rolled my eyes upon reading your Dear V column, however, this week’s contribution forced me to put fingers to keypad in sheer exasperation. My No. 1 issue would be how the so-called “victim of the ball snatcher” felt emasculated due to his lack of orgasm. Is this STILL the time we are living in? Is a man less of a man because he, on this one occasion, failed to climax?

As a firm believer in gender equality both in the bedroom and out, there have been times where either I or my partner have failed to climax. Does this emasculate (or even de-feminize for that matter) either of us? NO, because enjoyable sex is all about little give and take. There is nothing I like more than seeing my partner get off (for want of a better expression), and guess what, karma is usually kind to me on this occasion. The fact that your so-called “advice columnist” claims the “victim” is “reaping no reward” completely disregards the integrity of the woman in question, as does the laughable “advice” to “move on to a new one.”

These sentiments not only exclude the entire female audience from the Hurricane paper in favor of a man-on-man appreciation time, but it actually goes so far as to degrade women completely. And lastly, can we check our liberal use of the word “victim” when talking about this superficial problem from somebody seemingly so insecure and self-absorbed? The word “victim” implies some sort of violence, either physical or verbal, has been committed. In this instance I can see neither. This insensitivity should not be endorsed by the Hurricane nor University of Miami and it leaves me questioning the values of the school.