Escaping an unwanted rendezvous

In college, most students will end up regretting a hook up at some point. Many unwanted hook ups result from people not having enough of a backbone to say no, because they do not want to someone’s hurt feelings.

Just learn to say no. It sounds simple, but for some, being nice is obligatory. A hook up should never be obligatory. If it is not something that you want to do, then just do not do it.

If no is impossible for you, avoidance can be a backup plan. Remember, not every phone call or text message requires a response. If you see the person at a party, feel free to duck behind a friend or the bushes. Looking foolish might not be favorable, but if it works, take the cowardly way out.

If the pressures are coming from a close friend and you know it would not benefit your relationship, talk to them. You have a mouth. Use it. Communication is essential. An explanation of “I’m not really into you that way” will be far better than letting the other think the possibility is there.

Spontaneous hook ups seem sexy and risky, but they are not meant for everybody. Of course, not everyone can understand that others might not find them as attractive as they think they are. Egos, oftentimes, wind up being popped and deflated, especially when rejected.

Do not feel bad if you are the person who pops the ego bubble. Honestly, they will recover. Everyone could use a dose of humility. Remember they had the nerves to ask or insist on a little play time, so you can have the backbone to be honest and turn the offer down.