Hurriqueen: What to do about chronic readjuster?

Dear Hurriqueen,

One of my coworkers does this weird thing where he/she puts his/her hands down the frontside of their pants, itches and rubs around, and then proceeds to touch the computers and other objects in the office. It’s really uncomfortable to be around. When I see it I don’t know whether I should look away or pretend not to notice, and I always wonder if he gets some sort of disturbed pleasure out of it. Should I say something?

-Concerned employee


Dear Reader,

Eww! Sick. Gross. I’m about to throw up, which means a lot coming from a person who has record-breaking control over their gag reflex.

But seriously, I can understand your frustration. When I was younger, my older brother would constantly be rubbing down there, rearranging his business and whatnot. If there’s one thing I’m phobic about, it’s germs. And I let him know it. “What the hell are you doing?” I’d ask. “Could you be any trashier?”

Of course, duplicating this dialogue is not the right way for you to deal with your coworker’s itchuation. I think you’re polite to refer to this person as “he/she,” but let’s be honest: we all know it’s a guy. And he’s not a bad person. Just someone who took the “keep your hands to yourself” motto too seriously. But more than likely, he doesn’t even know what he’s doing. Perhaps he has grown so comfortable and “at home” around you that he thinks he can be himself – unedited.   

I’m not suggesting that his pube fluffing should be taken as a compliment. Rather, something must be done. Personally, I’d be too embarrassed to say something in person. If I were you, I’d log on to Yahoo!, create a phony email account and send an anonymous yet polite email. Don’t get all angry on him. Simply explain what you’ve noticed and that you’d appreciate it if he could refrain from spreading his junk juice around. Also, make sure you let him know that you like him and think he makes a great contribution at work. No doubt he’ll feel embarrassed, but the last thing we want to do is make this guy feel so ashamed that he won’t show his hands at work.

And one last thing sweetie: Make sure you’re bringing Lysol spray and Purell to the office.


The Hurriqueen

November 9, 2008


The Hurriqueen

Advice Columnist

Around the Web
  • Error
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

RSS Error: WP HTTP Error: fsocket timed out

Follow the sights and sounds of the pregame festivities in Orlando leading up to Saturday’s big matc ...

A team of researchers created the first mapping model of its kind to track how hate spreads and adap ...

University of Miami professors who study water treatment and civil engineering say that water contam ...

University of Miami experts in health geography, law, and public health weigh in on some of the issu ...

The Class of 2023 Stamps Scholars begin their first year at the University of Miami. ...

Senior linebackers Shaquille Quarterman, Michael Pinckney and Zach McCloud have already made history ...

The Hurricanes kick off their 2019 soccer campaign Thursday night against UTRGV. ...

Blake James details how Miami and Florida agreed to renew their rivalry with an upcoming home-and-ho ...

adidas x Miami announce continued collaboration with Parley for the Oceans ...

Canes legend Michael Irvin will be attendance for the event the night before the Miami-Florida game. ...

TMH Twitter
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.