Recently I’ve been noticing a trend among my peers: an epidemic of Ex-Significant Other Syndrome (E-SOS). Its victims suffer from the drama of ending a long-term relationship and the frustrations that come with the mixed emotions that linger. Since the problem may be prevalent on campus, I figured I’d make public some advice that may help the afflicted.
No student at UM can deny that part of the excitement of college involves being away from home and being exposed to so many different types of people. Among these new friendships we may find ourselves developing more serious relationships and even finding ourselves in love. It’s all quite wonderful.
Especially at UM, the various personalities we mingle with allow us to explore our own singularity. Basic arithmetic would prove that there are so many potentially wonderful relationships to be formed in this environment! But how are you ever going to find these people if you can’t let go of old relationships that aren’t working anymore? The lingering feelings are undeniable, but trust me – we mostly cling to the memory of how good it used to be. Wishing on a star that it could be like that again will resolve nothing – trying to rekindle the flame only prolongs the symptoms of E-SOS. You can’t seriously think you aren’t going to meet someone else – if you do, the odds are against you. But if you are at all a believer in the magical order of the cosmos that governs our lives you can bet that those who are truly meant to be together end up together. If they didn’t, the universe just wouldn’t operate properly.
So with this reassurance, wish your ex-partner the best and head in a new direction. If at all possible, you should leave on good terms and maybe check in every once in a while and see how their life is going. If you shared something amazing once, it would be a pity to never have this person in your life again – who knows what they might be doing 10 years from now. It’s all about networking, right? More importantly, it’s about experience. Dive in, fishies.
– Christina Sava, Sophomore