Boo hoo. You don’t have a Valentine. Get over it already, please, for all of us who try to be happy and have generally pleasant days.
It never fails that every Feb. 14 when I sign onto AIM, every single one of my friends has some sappy away message about not having a Valentine. Maybe I just have depressing friends, but that’s the way it always is.
You know, kids, Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be a big deal if you don’t want it to be. Compare it to your future 30th birthday. I know on Feb. 28, 2016, I will most likely be found curled up in bed eating lots of cookies and not celebrating. Why? Because I feel like if I don’t celebrate, it never happened.
We can apply this solution to Valentine’s Day: If you don’t have a Valentine, instead of pulling the rest of us down with you into your deep dark hole of despair, just pretend the entire day doesn’t exist. It’s just a period of 24 hours squeezed in between Feb. 13 and Feb. 15.
Or, if you’re like me, use the day to treat yourself to some fabulous stuff you otherwise couldn’t condone spending money on: stuffed animals, ice cream, chocolates or a cute pair of shoes. Even better, buy lots of girly comfort food, grab your girl friends and watch When Harry Met Sally.
My sophomore year, I was single (and lonely), but decided to drive down to Target and buy a stuffed animal since I really like them. I also picked up a bag of candy hearts because they rock. Then I went back to my dorm, ate my candy hearts with my roommate and then we watched a movie. Simple. We used the day to slack and eat candy hearts.
If you’re a guy, buy a pretty girl some flowers. She’ll either fall in love with you immediately or instantly reject you. And if that is the case, grab your guy friends and take a cue from Dane Cook: “Screw chicks tonight, bro, I gotta dance!”
If you are in a relationship and are beginning to feel the pressure of pulling off some miraculous Valentine’s Day extravaganza at the last minute, stop now and re-evaluate your relationship. If you feel pressured into buying some expensive gift or planning an über-romantic night, sit your significant other down and suggest a simpler night. A big price tag doesn’t always equal quality.
My plans for Valentine’s Day? Dinner at home and a movie. There will be some cute cards and candy involved, but other than that, it’s simple, yet effective. I’m so busy the rest of the week that I’m sure my boyfriend will appreciate me not working for one night.
So keep it simple. Don’t stress. Or just pretend the day never existed at all.
Ashley Davidson is a senior majoring in journalism and studio art. She likes candy hearts the best and may be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.