don’t wanna just be another trophy wife?

    Dear V,

    I’m a senior here at UM, and I’m going to graduate in less than a month with a degree in psychology. There’s just one problem…I’m totally terrified, and I have no clue what I want to do with my life. All my friends seem to have so much direction-they’re going to medical school, law school, and graduate school, or they have great jobs lined up. Not me. I’m beginning to think there’s nothing out there for me. I kind of want to stay in college for the rest of my life. Is this normal? Am I crazy? Maybe I’d be better off as a trophy wife…

    ~Freaked Out Senior

    Dear Reader,

    Please don’t fret-you’re not nuts! As a matter of fact, you’re in good company-even the trophy wife dream isn’t completely off the wall. Have you taken a good look around? Yeah, looks like a good percentage of the tanorexic girls on this campus are just here to find themselves a sugar daddy. But you and I both know you can do better, even if you haven’t landed that six-figure salary yet.

    Frankly, I’m more sketched out when I meet college students who do know exactly what they want in life. I think it’s a little spooky and, quite frankly, rather unlikely. Other than crazy overachievers who do have a pretty clear path ahead of them (you know the type: in kindergarten they declared that they wanted to be a doctor, and now…well, they’re off to Johns Hopkins), most people change jobs like they change their underwear. OK, maybe not that often, but they’re no more secure in their future than you.

    I once asked my mother what her ambitions were as a child, and she replied, “Honey, I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.” The truth is, life isn’t black and white, and there isn’t always a clear course ahead of us.

    No one can tell you what to do, and the only person that can make you happy is you. This may not be exactly what you wanted to hear, I know, but all is not lost. While your dream job isn’t going to fall in your lap, there are people who can help you figure out where to begin.

    Have you been to a little hidden gem I like to call the Toppel Career Center? A diamond in the rough, I know-turns out these people will not only help you find your calling in life, they’ll actually help you get a job! Who’d’a’thunk it? Visit their website at, or drop by their office in the UC. They’ll be a big help, I promise.

    Most importantly, remember that it’s totally normal to feel a little lost-you’re a grown up now (rather alarming, I know). And hey, you can always fall back on that sugar daddy…

    Best of Luck!

    Fact’o’the Day: A man’s beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex. So basically…always.

    Please send probing inquiries to All questions and comments will remain anonymous.