Opinion

Fat, ugly and educated

How are the three things above related? Well, apparently the common link is that they are all things men do not look for in a woman. At least that’s how I’ve been feeling in recent times. From real life to movies, this country is littered with examples of men who are unable to cope with enlightened women. Is it possible that a man’s masculinity is threatened by an “edumacated” woman?

When examining traditional gender roles and the anatomy of compatibility, the only analogy my mind can conjure is the following: Pretend two-liter measuring cup A represents a man, two-liter measuring cup B represents a woman, and both cups are filled to 1.5 liters with water. In this case, water represents level of education which at 1.5 liters would be relatively high. It’s socially acceptable for measuring cup A to date a measuring cup with any level of water, whereas measuring cup B would be expected to date a value near or above 1.5 liters.

Obviously, the problem here is that measuring cup A has a much greater range of possibilities, creating a nearly impossible amount of competition for measuring cup B to overcome. Especially considering that even though measuring cup C is only at about 0.7 liters, she’s got a great ass and bisexual tendencies. So I pose the question: is measuring cup A’s manliness threatened by 1.5 liters of water?

Just the other day, I caught an episode of the Dr. Phil show. He was examining the relationship between a 40 year-old doctor and an 18 year-old blond who met on sugardaddie.com.

The doctor insisted his relationship would work because he could be the dominant figure. In fact, he mentioned that he broke up with his last girlfriend who was a college professor with a Ph.D. because she wanted to contribute 50/50 to the relationship. However, he felt the need to play an overwhelmingly masculine role which landed him on TV, only to look like a complete douche.

Though probably not applicable to real life, in the movie “I Heart Huckabees,” Naomi Watts’ character goes from shallow and self-absorbed to existentially enlightened. Immediately following the transition, her boyfriend, played by Jude Law, begins badgering her about returning to good-looks and vanity. Prompted by his remarks, she made a memorable quote: “You just can’t handle my infinite nature, can you?” Jude Law’s answer is, “No, because you can’t run with the Joneses when your girlfriend isn’t a trophy no mo’.” Then you won’t be the man, brother!

Maybe I’m over-reacting out of frustration, but maybe I’m onto something. I can totally sympathize with women who are at 1.7 liters, but act like they’re at 0.2 liters – perhaps Jessica Simpson or Anna Nicole Smith?

Does less educated really mean less threatening? I wonder what Dr. Phil would say about the infinite nature of measuring cup B and her ability to find love. And I really wonder if I can also find true love on sugardaddie.com.

Alicia is a first year graduate student majoring in sports medicine. Arguments may be forwarded to a.montalvo@umiami.edu.

November 21, 2006

Reporters

The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

A six-pack of Hurricanes notes on a Thursday evening: ▪ UM coach Mark Richt has explained his decisi ...

The Miami Hurricanes had traveled half the field to start the second half when coach Mark Richt enco ...

Jeremiah Payton was one of those prospects the Miami Hurricanes coveted from just about the time he ...

The Miami Hurricanes’ secondary continues to get stronger. Miami, which already holds a pair of comm ...

Mark Richt said he’s spending the bye week evaluating everything about Miami’s offense, a process th ...

Two families with deep ties to Miami—the Millers and Fains— celebrate two endowed faculty chair appo ...

A fabulous team of staff and volunteers labors long and hard, primed with school spirit, behind the ...

The University of Miami remembers alumnus Erik Hauri—the man who discovered water on the moon. ...

Through an innovative program, Miami Law students are empowering local high schoolers to think like ...

The global exploration, media, and education company will kick off a national campaign at UM to offe ...

University of Miami head coach Gino DiMare released the Hurricanes' 2019 baseball schedule Thur ...

The University of Miami men's tennis team will take part in the ITA Southeast Regional Champion ...

The University of Miami women's swimming & diving team returns to competition this weekend, ...

The University of Miami volleyball team is set to host Clemson and Georgia Tech in the first of four ...

Four members of the Miami women's tennis team will take part in the ITA Southeast Regional Cham ...

TMH Twitter
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.