Irony spares no one, not even the University of Miami

Strike Support?

Students and teachers seem to be showing their support for the UNICCO workers by having classes outside by the Ashe building. Being that they are showing support is fine and good; however, they move the chairs outside around and leave papers on the ground. Who do they think cleans all that up? The very UNICCO workers they are trying to help. It doesn’t really make sense.

Waterless Urinals?

Waterless urinals were installed in the men’s bathrooms last semester. It is a good thing that the University is trying to save the environment. The problem is that they installed one or two of the waterless urinals among all the normal urinals. They are placed in the center of the urinals, and no one wants to pee in the center urinal. So, generally people won’t use them because they think they are weird and they aren’t saving any water.

Duck Poop?

Last year everyone complained that the alligator was destroying the duck population of the school. They took away the alligator and now the sidewalks are covered in duck poop, which brings about not only an eye sore and smell but infections as well. I say bring back our reptilian friend and bring back cleaner sidewalks.

Chlorine in the fountains?

For those of you who are fortunate enough to be awake before 8 in the morning you should know what I am talking about. The fountains here seem to have more chlorine in them than the pool. They smell horrible. I guess it’s alright, though; chlorine sure beats duck poop.

The Dogs?

This campus has gone to the dogs. Yes it is a beautiful campus. Yes everyone should be able to enjoy it along with their animals. But that doesn’t give the people the right to allow their dogs to drink from the same water fountains as everyone else. I guess it makes sense since the other fountains are poisoned with chlorine. Also the people should clean up after their dogs, so when the students go to sunbath in the grass they don’t have to worry about anything.

Jews for Jesus?

Must have missed that class in Hebrew school.

Justin Diamond is a junior majoring in management. He enjoys cooking and eating, and can be contacted at