Pack up your scarf; ‘cold front’ is over

It’s time to salt the roads, everybody; the cold front has passed.

Our palm trees, dilapidated by winter’s callous frost, shall wilt no longer. Our sandy beaches, frozen over by a thick sheet of Mother Nature’s wrath, can defrost under the sun and finally revert to their Corona commercial-like perfection. Migrating birds, forced to trek even farther south, can freely swoop back to South Florida, now that we are free from…

40-degree weather? Really? An odd sight it is to see Miami’s natives, undaunted by fierce, swirling hurricanes, impervious to sweltering heat and butter-thick humidity, as they (literally) shake in their boots. And scarves. And gloves. And toboggans.

Such is life here in Paradise Central, where we sip on hot cocoa, light the fireplace (Warning, South Floridians: Open the flue first) and cuddle on couches to avoid a bitter two-day winter-all while we watch Olympians battle it out in the powdery-thick Italian Alps, where it really is below freezing.

But who could blame us? These are the rare opportunities we get to crack out the winter clothes and blast the heaters in our cars. When else can you see Miami’s most beautiful women walking around in tall leather boots-wearing more than just belt-length skirts directly above them? Where else can you see absolutely irrational behavior in the face of temperate weather? Well, the northeast.

Just go up to New York, Massachusetts or Connecticut on the rare winter occasion that the temperature spikes above 60 degrees, and you’ll see the very same phenomenon, only in the form of shorts and a T-shirt, with windows rolled down. What better way to get perspective on just how good we have it down here in Miami?

How good? Check the 10-day forecast.