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Dear V

Dear V,

I met this guy recently who I thought was really into me. We went on a few dates where I ended up spending a few great nights at his place. I thought that things were going really well and that we were on the road to something a little more serious. He gave me no indication otherwise. However, now, whenever I call him, he doesn’t return my phone calls. I understand that maybe he doesn’t like me as much as I thought he did, but I can’t seem to get him off my mind! I don’t know what has happened to me. I am really not even interested in meeting new guys. I’ve started dating other people, but I really just can’t seem to get this one off my mind. I never fall for anyone easily, and I’ve never acted like this before! It’s completely irrational behavior for me, and I don’t know what to do about it.

Going crazy

Dear Reader,

Ain’t infatuation a bitch? Besides going crazy, I’m sure that you’ve dedicated countless amounts of precious time to this winner when you were actually supposed to be functioning in a somewhat productive manner. Yeah, I don’t know of any girl who hasn’t been there, to be quite honest.

Recently, however, I’ve been doing some reading on “love sickness,” which I know sounds pretty hokey given today’s super scientific psychological explanations for the way that human beings think and feel. But, there are facets of “love sickness,” or the state of mind experienced by one who is going through the initial stage of being in love that resemble obsessive-compulsive disorder. Furthermore, according to Dr. Frank Tallis, the author of Love Sick, exhibiting only five of the major symptoms that this newfound love and infatuation can bring about-sleeplessness, loss of appetite, obsessive, uncontrollable thoughts, delusions, the inability to concentrate, compulsive, impulsive behavior-are enough to warrant one the diagnosis of a major depressive episode.

I think that the only way to get over this guy is to make sure that you absolutely abstain from contacting him regardless of the way that you feel. It’s fairly obvious that he doesn’t want to date you anymore, let alone pursue any kind of relationship. Even in your weakest, most alcohol drenched moments you must promise yourself that you will refrain from calling, texting, facebooking, etc. I might even suggest that you take his phone number out of your phone, if that’s not too difficult for you right now.

As for your dating life, as appealing as it might be to sit on the couch and eat cartons of Ben and Jerry’s while you watch reruns into the early hours of Saturday morning (yes!), you absolutely cannot afford to do that to yourself! It’s great that you’ve started dating again even though you’re not totally into it, but who knows? You might find yourself falling if you give yourself the chance. And, if these new prospects don’t keep your mind off this guy, at least you’re up, out, about, and meeting new people. My last suggestion is that you just wait this fever out because it’s pretty much the only other thing that you can do.

Best of luck!

V.

Fact O’ the Day.the smallest erect penis on record measured a whopping one centimeter.

Please send probing inquiries to DearV@hotmail.com or drop V a line in her box in the office of The Hurricane. All questions and comments will remain anonymous.

V. is a senior majoring in psychology and creative writing.

February 7, 2006

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The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.