Advice for taking standardized tests

(U-Wire) Honolulu – Standardize tests. Whether it is the PPST, SAT, ACT, PLT, GRE, OR XYZ, standardize tests do not really test anything, or do they? If they do not test anything, then why are students constantly told to partake in this time consuming ritual year after year? What is the purpose behind this undying habit? I have conducted a little bit of research to find out why.
Advice 1) Learn to fill in the bubbles! One lesson in life you regain, more like review, with standardize tests is how to color. The skill you gained in Kindergarten becomes vital for standardize test. Remember when your kindergarten teacher kept constantly reminding you to stay in the lines? For standardize tests, you need to stay in the lines when marking your answers.
Advice 2) Break out your high school math book. Remember when you looked at all those wacky formulas thinking, “When the hell am I going to need to find the area of a circle?” Furthermore, who cares about a boat traveling upstream with the current at 3 mph and figuring out the speed of the boat? When I am in a boat, I am just thinking about not having it sink or capsize. But these are the types of questions one will face when taking the tests.
Advice 3) Purchase winter garments. One essential piece of information omitted from instruction book is the temperature of the room where you take the test. You need to make sure you bring with you on testing day the following: Parka, electric blanket, hot water bottle, gloves, extra socks, gas heater, etc. For two to three hours you are entrapped in a room, which feels like Antarctica.

January 24, 2003


The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami

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