“Worst of the Supposed Best”

Every year, in what’s become an annual tradition, critics put out both their worst and best lists. It’s pretty obvious, though, that Freddy got Fingered and Tomb Raider are terrible movies. What’s more interesting are the movies that got critical acclaim but were actually quite horrible. Here is a list of five things from 2001 that were highly regarded yet turned out to be real duds.

Bob Dylan’s Love and Theft:
No other CD got more critical acclaim than this messy, garbled album from the incomprehensible, highly revered artist. It became apparent to me the crappiness of this CD in the last song, as Dylan rants, “Love is pleasing, love is teasing, love’s not an evil thing.” Sounds quite similar to a certain Beverly Hills 90210 soundtrack, but at least Vanessa Williams isn’t as pretentious as the Dylanmeister. Ugh.

Waking Life:
Please…a dizzing animated film about philosophical principles of life. The movie isn’t intelligent or smart or sophisticated or any of those things stupid critics have been proclaiming. Instead, it’s pretentious, moronic, plotless, and feels like a college bull session. All that and Ethan Hawke ranting about the meaning of life. EEK!

I’ve lost more friends over my hatred for this movie than anything else. I realize everybody loves it, but don’t they see that Amelie’s romanticism is a fake? I didn’t care if these two would get together basically because there was nothing keeping them apart. And why were they right for each other again? Call me a cynic, but that was life through glasses a bit too rose-colored.

The Royal Tenenbaums:
Or how bout the royal tenenBOMBS… As wonderful as Rushmore was, The Royal Tenenbaums strikes out on all accounts. Bill Murray does his best to not be Bill Murray and Gene Hackman tries his best to be Bill Murray. Worst than that is the sullen, detached tone of the entire movie. You mostly feel like a child psychologist trying to connect to a mute orphan.

Family Guy:
Critics for the most part hate this show, but some stupid kids on this college campus somehow defend this ugly, mean-spirited trite Simpsons rip off. Gag after crappy gag, the Family Guy proves that the beauty of the Simpsons is its heart, something the Family Guy has none of. Hopefully the show will be put to its rest quite soon.