Parking Blunders

Just when I think the bigwigs of the University of Miami can’t sink any lower than they have, they strike again and pull another boneheaded move.
As I walked back to my room in Eaton after a refreshing Christmas break, what to my wondering eyes should appear? A brand new patio in front of the building replete with concrete tables and chairs. What did I not see? At least six parking spaces that they needlessly paved over to create this patio. Who made that decision, and would somebody please fire him, her, or them? I absolutely can’t understand why any intelligent individual or individuals would decide to do such a thing. At what point, after hearing students’ incessant grievous complaints about the atrocious parking situation, does one decide to make it even worse?
Now, we all know that parking is always a problem on campus, but this year it is absolutely horrifying. And, judging from the latest decision, it is not going to get any better. With the biggest freshman class ever and much of the serpentine parking lot out of commission because of construction, students almost always find themselves desperate to find any spot in any lot. It is like living in New York City.
School authorities suggest parking in the garage or in the Metrorail parking lot on Ponce de Leon Boulevard. If that fails, they suggest we get to campus a few hours early. However, on at least five occasions, I have arrived at 10 a.m. (four hours before my first class) only to find that every legal space in every legal parking lot has been taken. Moreover, cars are jammed into illegal parking spaces. And without fail, the trusty meter maid is handing out tickets or Jose’s towing company is confiscating someone’s car.
What’s more, I recently appealed a parking ticket and as of yet have not received a reply. Is it too much to ask that they answer my appeal?
And so I ask the administration, what are we to do? Should we just stay home? Circle the campus for hours? Walk to school? Maybe the university could pave over all of the parking lots, making it illegal to park anywhere. Or maybe they could simply order us to slip a $20 bill under our wipers should we have the audacity to park on campus.

Travis Atria is a sophomore majoring in English literature and minoring in complaining about the school.