Dear V: Halloweenzilla ruining holiday with perfect party every year

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Dear V,

My girlfriend is absolutely obsessed with Halloween.

Every year, she throws a gigantic, expensive party. She goes all out: arranging catered food, renting a bar, hiring a live band, you name it. The decorations are plastered all over the walls and everything is orchestrated down to the nitty-gritty details.

She basically turns into a Bridezilla, except instead of her wedding, it’s just a Halloween party. She’s like a Halloweenzilla – or, to be frank, a total witch.

Ninety-nine percent of the time, my girlfriend is a loving, sweet and wonderful person to be around. But the last week of October has been absolute hell for me these last three years, and I’m tired of it.

She makes me help her with all the planning, down to the point of picking out what color the punch bowl should be and where the fake spider webs should be hung. She insists on badgering me for my opinion until I’ve helped her enough for her to be satisfied.

You’d think she’d get the hint that she’s no fun to be around if all of her female friends bail on planning the party with her and she has to decorate with her boyfriend, but nope. Totally clueless.

I’m so sick of it. I just want to go out to a bar and grab some drinks with friends and maybe throw on a mask or something. This party is way too important to my girlfriend for me to bail, but I’m tired of dealing with the chaos. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Fatigued Frankenstein

Dear Frankenstein,

Sure, this party clearly matters to your girlfriend. After all, who would cough up all that dough otherwise? But if it doesn’t matter to you at all, you shouldn’t be forced to help.

Now, of course, if she wasn’t such a Halloweenzilla, I’d say it’s your boyfriendly duty to help her out. But because she’s being such a –  cough  – witch, you shouldn’t feel required to ruin your holiday every year just to placate the decorations dictator.

Let your girlfriend know as soon as possible that you won’t be helping out this go-around. She’s bound to be devastated and it might even cause a fight, especially if she can’t get any of her girlfriends to help her out.

However, maybe this will be the wake-up call that she needs. Once she realizes she’s making it miserable for the guests by being such a perfectionist, she might finally chill out a bit.

That could be wishful thinking, but ya can’t help but hope.

Have fun this year and do what you enjoy, and let the chips fall as they may. Hopefully your girlfriend will turn back from a werewolf to a human on Nov. 1, and you can continue with your otherwise happy relationship.

-V

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