Dear V

Dear V: Caught red-handed … or so she thought

Dear V,

My cousin is visiting from out of town so we’ve been spending time together. Since she lives across the country, I’ve been taking her to local events and showing her around.

I guess my girlfriend got the wrong idea because she’s been asking why I’ve been distant lately. I didn’t even get the chance to answer her text before she told me one of her friends sent her “proof” that I was cheating: a picture of me and the “dumb side b*tch” I was out with.

If I try to explain that I’m hanging out with my cousin, she probably won’t believe me even though it’s the truth. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Dear Innocent Until Proven Guilty,

Life isn’t a “Law and Order” episode. If your girlfriend had a problem with your behavior, she should’ve talked to you directly before sending her squad out to hunt you down for evidence.

You’re not a criminal, so you shouldn’t be treated like one. If you’ve never cheated before, she had no right to climb into your business like this – especially since you’re not doing anything suspicious. There’s nothing wrong with hanging out with someone of the opposite gender, whether or not they’re family. I’m sure she wouldn’t appreciate you accusing her of cheating every time she grabs a beer with her guy friends.

Unfortunately, some people have a tendency to be possessive and jealous. Whether it stems from a lack of trust or an awful experience of being cheated on in the past, sometimes one party thinks the other has been unfaithful when that isn’t the case.

Usually, I’d say to patch it up with your girl, but here it’s best for you to move on.

It was totally disrespectful of her to send her friends to stake you out like that, not to mention calling your cousin a “dumb side b*tch.”

It might just be sneaking a picture of you now, but in the future this will turn into reading your texts and emails, stealing your phone passcode, following you to work and even demanding you ditch your female friends.

Don’t condone her behavior by defending yourself. Leave her alone to work out her issues and move on to a girl who won’t track your every move.

Heck, dig out a family picture of you and your cousin and send it to her. Make it clear you’re not dating your “dumb side b*tch” cousin and you’re no longer dating her, either.

It’s time to find someone who wants a healthy, jealousy-free relationship.

-V

 

 

February 3, 2016

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

Miami coach Mark Richt nearly went through his weekly teleconference Sunday without anyone asking hi ...

I opened my eyes this morning and for the first time in a long time, maybe all season, didn’t say, “ ...

If defense really does win championships, the University of Miami is in good shape. Despite giving u ...

This is the Miami Hurricanes team that finally solved its long hex in finally winning at Florida Sta ...

1. HURRICANES: No. 3 Canes beat Virginia in home finale: ACC title game, first 10-win season since 2 ...

The Finker-Frenkel Legacy Foundation gift will establish the Business Plan Competition Endowed Fund. ...

C. David Naylor, a UM Presidential Scholar and public health policy expert, provided insight into he ...

A cohort of five religious leaders from Miami, including a rabbi and imam from the University of Mia ...

Hollywood actress and star of the hit BET series Being Mary Jane gets real about gender, race and co ...

The annual development agreement meeting is a time for the city and University to share information ...

Miami survived an early scare to beat Virginia, 44-28, and achieve its first 10-win season since 200 ...

For the second straight week, the Miami Hurricanes were ranked No. 2 in both the Associated Press po ...

The Miami women's basketball team dropped a 67-61 decision to Colorado on Saturday afternoon in ...

The University of Miami volleyball team closed out the weekend with a convincing 3-0 win at Virginia ...

The University of Miami volleyball team produced some late-match magic Friday night to outlast an in ...

TMH Twitter Feed
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.