Dear V

I just want to hang out in my birthday suit …

V,

All I want in my short life is to be able to walk around naked. I want to stop having to wear clothes to school and just hang out in my birthday suit. I mentioned this to my girlfriend of a few weeks the other day, and she seemed really creeped out. She said something about not wanting to have to see my penis all the time. Frankly, I was a little bit offended. She should be attracted to me. Should I just chuck her and find a new girl who accepts me for who I am, or should I just throw caution to the wind and condition her to seeing me naked all the time?

 

Sincerely, 

I just want to let it go

 

 

Dear Ludacris,

The very first thing that I suggest is that you do what you want and just be naked.

I get it – there’s a sort of freedom that comes from just letting it all air out.

I don’t, however, recommend doing this in public. It’s disturbing to others and, realistically, illegal. So, unless you want to be that creepy guy who streaks at a football game, I would keep your naked urges contained.

I want to say that you should tell your girlfriend to calm down and let you be, but especially if this a new thing, I can understand where she’s coming from. If I’m in a new relationship with someone, I enjoy getting to know them and becoming more intimate, but I certainly don’t need to be looking at you naked three weeks in. You know what I mean?

Nevertheless, it depends on where you see this relationship going. If you think it’s going to last, then just tell her that she should accept you for who you are. If it’s a person you’re just seeing, then you should most definitely find someone who is willing to love all of you.

I’m sure the issue with her not feeling like staring at your man junk all the time has nothing to do with her being or not being attracted to you. Maybe she’s just afraid she won’t be able to control herself around you when you’re naked.

Have an open conversation with your lady and try and work this out. If it’s an absolute deal breaker for her, then just move on and be naked somewhere else.

I know there are a few beaches down here that appreciate that sort of thing.

 

V

April 16, 2014

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

In 2016, the Miami Hurricanes had tight end David Njoku, who went in the first round of the 2017 NFL ...

Four days had passed since his University of Miami basketball team squandered a 13-point second half ...

The Miami Hurricanes’ search for offensive line help is set to continue on the weekend of Jan. 26, w ...

It looks like Chad Thomas will have another opportunity to show NFL scouts that he is ready to play ...

Hurricanes fans, get out your pencils, calendars and a list of your favorite hotels. The Atlantic Co ...

Presidents at three higher education institutions in Miami "lend our unified voices” to the cal ...

Thirty high school English teachers from Brazil are spending six weeks at UM in a new skill-building ...

Global and local efforts needed to respond to biological threats, UM President Julio Frenk warned at ...

As artificial Intelligence takes hold, tech visionary David Kenny stresses keeping human values in t ...

UM’s First Black Graduates Project committee visits an iconic D.C. museum for inspiration to create ...

The Canes won four events against FGCU on Saturday while also recording a total of 11 top-three fini ...

The University of Miami men's tennis team (1-1) opened the spring portion of its 2017-18 schedu ...

The Miami women's basketball resumes play Sunday at 1 p.m., at Boston College with its northern ...

The University of Miami track and field team starred in the Lone Star State, as the Hurricanes shone ...

The Miami women's tennis team dominated play on its home court Friday to open the 2018 spring s ...

TMH Twitter Feed
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.