Dear V

My crush count is above par …

V,

This past weekend, I was visiting a few friends in The Windy City, and I realized that I’m extremely attracted to all of them. I’m very conflicted because most of these people are in relationships. So do I want to be a homewrecker, or do I just want a guest appearance at some point? 

I don’t know what to do. HELP.

Sincerely,

Conniving for a Cameo

Dear Tiger Woods,

I don’t think it’s weird that you have these urges. You should probably try and contain them when you’re in public, but it’s OK to be horny. It’s almost summer – it’s hot and sticky outside, and we all know what happens in Miami when it’s hot. People just start taking their clothes off.

As far as your friends in Chi-town, my advice is that you try and talk it out with a few of them. If you’re as close as I think you are, then when the topic comes up casually in conversation – just casually – present  the idea. Just make it known that it’s something you would be interested in should the opportunity arise.

I’m sure that after a few drinks, this conversation could take the turn you want it to. Let’s be real here – people in their 20s are always on board to experiment, and why not do it with someone you’re already comfortable with.

Still, you should tread carefully.

We all saw what happened with Hilary Duff in “Gossip Girl.” Penn Badgely was all about a threesome and then he focused on that girl who was his best friend in elementary school and Hilary Duff got all pissed and dumped him. This is not to say that your life is “Gossip Girl,” but things like these could go very wrong very fast.

It’s easy for people to get awkward, and that would cause your relationship to suffer. So just evaluate this situation, and make sure you’re prepared for any and all consequences.

You’re sure to get at least one interesting night out of this scenario, so I say just go for it.

But don’t contract any weird diseases.

V

April 13, 2014

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