Comments Off

16 February 2014

Dear V: I’m falling for my stepsister …

V,

My dad remarried three years ago, and my stepmom has a hot daughter. I found out she is coming to UM next fall as a freshman. I don’t know what to do. Should I avoid her? Should I pretend I don’t imagine us having sex?

Love Not Actually

 

Dear Karen Smith,

While I can understand the allure of a younger mate, you should set your sights on someone who won’t be sitting across the table from you at Thanksgiving dinners.

Let’s visualize this situation for a moment: You get with her, and it’s awesome so you keep doing it. It’s tons of fun, because let’s face it, anything that’s even slightly illicit seems fun. It’s all very exciting and erotic, and you play footsie during your weekly family dinners.

But then your parents find out. And then what happens? I’ll tell you: Your parents get really freaked out and look at you like you’re aliens. They will tell you that you should move to Podunk, Ky., because who marries their sister in Miami?

You then go on to answer that you’re not getting married; you’re just having fun. They later freak out some more because ew, you’re their children. It’ll just end up being a sh*t show.

However, I do think it’s worth giving into temptation. We’re all entitled to our guilty pleasures every now and then.

Show her around town and hang out with her. Maybe being with her for prolonged periods of time and in social settings makes you realize how annoying she actually is. Or maybe you’ll just fall madly in love with her.

Just play it by ear. If you need a reference on stepbrother/sister relationships, check out some Italian films. Those crazy Europeans are chock full of racy information.

V