V's Take

Dear V: I just want to be closer …

V,

So my boyfriend just broke up with me after a three-year relationship, and he said he wanted space because I’m “too clingy” and I “smothered” him. This doesn’t make any sense to me though, because I’ve been living in Miami while he’s in Tallahassee. I thought everything was working out. Here’s where I messed up: I freaked out because I thought he wanted space to cheat on me, so I hacked into his email and Facebook. I also may have called a billion times because I was trying to catch him with someone else. He’s blocked my number and now he wants a full month with no contact. But he said we can meet in December when he’s back in town, and we’ll go out and see if we still have feelings for each other. I know that he never ever cheated and he really just wanted space for school, but I don’t know what to do. Do you think I should still have feelings for him and keep trying to save this relationship?

Sincerely,

Clingy and A Bit Crazy

 

Dear Glenn Close,

While your attraction to your boyfriend may not be so fatal, it’s clear to me that your relationship is a little less than healthy.

Please take as little offense as possible, but why in the hell would you ever snoop through his things? I’m the first one to get cranky and jealous – and I can hold a grudge longer than Lady Liberty has held up her torch but Jesus Christ, I don’t hack into people’s emails.

That’s illegal and, frankly, just a little bit crazy.

I’m glad you think the two of you will get back together in December – apart from being a criminal, you’re clearly clinically insane and need to be checked into a mental facility like yesterday.

You need to stand up for yourself and move on. It’s not worth pining over your gross Tallanasty boyfriend when you could be out experiencing freshman year all over again. If he’s not smart enough to decline his acceptance to FSU, then he’s not smart enough for you to talk to or even be in a relationship with.

Do yourself a favor and forget about him. Keep the “crazy” theme going and burn some pictures of his around a campfire while singing old African tribal songs. It’s a very cathartic exercise, and it might even bring you some good relationship voodoo karma.

Just resist the urge to boil his pet bunny.

V

November 3, 2013

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

The Miami Hurricanes will have plenty of talent on both sides of the ball this season, and four play ...

Jesus Luzardo had yet to throw a single pitch as a professional baseball player in 2016 when he unde ...

Former Miami Hurricanes quarterback Robert Marve has been arrested in Hillsborough County on an out- ...

Mark Richt has led the Miami Hurricanes back into the national college football conversation during ...

University of Miami coach Mark Richt and his vaunted 2018 signing class, nicknamed #Storm18, should ...

A School of Communication associate professor played an important hand—an artistic one!—in World Cup ...

University of Miami law and political science professors weigh in on Trump’s SCOTUS nominee. ...

Research bioclimatologists with the UM Synoptic Climatology Lab counsel cities on how to manage risi ...

A UM-led study is examining how children’s play behavior at beaches could impact their health. ...

Political polarization, distrust in fact-based knowledge and verbal targeting may be fueling the ons ...

University of Miami head volleyball coach Jose "Keno" Gandara announced the additions of K ...

Three-time CSCAA Honorable Mention All-American diver Wally Layland and two-time ITA All-American te ...

Miami head women's tennis coach Paige Yaroshuk-Tews announced Thursday the signing of two more ...

University of Miami head football coach Mark Richt was among the 20 coaches selected to the preseaso ...

Miami opens the Wooden Legacy against La Salle on Thanksgiving Day in Fullerton, Calif. ...

TMH Twitter
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.