V's Take

Dear V: Is a climax a month worth the relationship?…

Dear V,

I am currently in this long-distance relationship with my boyfriend from Virginia. We meet up once a month and have incredible sex. Unfortunately, I worry that our relationship is losing its spark and is becoming too physical. Is the distance a problem? What should I do?

Sleepless in Miami

 

Sext a la Skype,

I admire your reference to “Sleepless in Seattle” because it highlights your situation but completely gives you the wrong impression. Their magical bond that transcends low-frequency radio waves and only helps strengthen their love does not equate to your excuse for sex.

I agree with you, though. There is nothing like the promise of long-awaited sex with a familiar face. You can practice new moves from your Kama Sutra app, revisit old ones and never skip a beat.

But there’s the problem. Your relationship has reached the inevitable plateau.

During this plateau, work and school replace heated passions. Daily Skype sessions have become weekly or biweekly. The novelty of an exciting return and the makeout session in the airport terminal turn stale and quite frankly boring.

Yes, the distance between Miami and Virginia influences your relationship dynamic, but its effect has its limits.

Sometimes the distance reminds you that you might be ready for something exciting. At the very least, you are one step closer to Executive Platinum status.

I can imagine all of the latest possibilities for a Miami girl in her prime: an arboretum attraction, a Grove gallop and sharing Smirnoff at the Rat. Never underestimate the power of good alliteration.

You have to make the decision, unfortunately. Do you want to continue phone and Internet sex punctuated by five indulgent sex-filled returns? Or are you prepared to a take a leap of faith, the breakdown of a relationship based on proximity and not any real promise?

Either way, you have to realize your life is not a Nora Ephron movie. Get it together.

V

January 27, 2013

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

It’s the play Miami Hurricanes fans will never forget — and Florida State fans are trying to forget. ...

Miami Hurricanes fans might recall their favorite college football players in past years dreaming of ...

The new quarterback is usually the ones fans gush over. For the University of Miami, last season it ...

Debate all you want, but University of Miami football coach Mark Richt made it clearer than ever Wed ...

Last year, when University of Miami tailback Mark Walton attended the Atlantic Coast Conference Foot ...

UM dining services team earns national recognition for special event catering. ...

From hammerheads to great whites, University of Miami researcher Neil Hammerschlag is a dedicated sp ...

An ACLU report authored by UM sociologists documents racial and ethnic disparities in Miami-Dade Cou ...

Following the summit between Trump and Putin, reaction from politicians, pundits and former intellig ...

A School of Communication associate professor played an important hand—an artistic one!—in World Cup ...

Miami senior Tyler Gauthier was named to the 2018 Fall Watch List for the Rimington Trophy presented ...

Miami junior wide receiver Ahmmon Richards was among those named to the watch list for the 2018 Bile ...

University of Miami junior running back Travis Homer was named a preseason candidate for the Doak Wa ...

Six former Canes competed on NBA Summer League teams, with three averaging at least 10 points per ga ...

Quick Hits gives University of Miami volleyball fans an opportunity to get to know the new student-a ...

TMH Twitter
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.