V's Take

Dear V: Sloppy kisses are slobbering all over my relationship…

Dear V,

My boyfriend’s a really bad kisser.  When we first started dating, I figured he would get better with more practice, but that hasn’t exactly happened.  I don’t want to break up with him over something this silly because I really like him, but honestly kissing him isn’t even that fun.  How do I tell him without making him upset? 

Sincerely, 

Tongue-Tied

 

Dear Lackluster Lip Lock,

Not everyone is a majestic kisser.  Some people have amazing lip talents (yours truly), while others (your boyfriend) fall a bit short.  Let’s hope he’s not falling short in other departments as well.

There’s no reason to break up with him. Men are trainable. If you’ve liked him enough to stay with him despite his inability to kiss like a man, there’s no reason to end things now. What you need to do is take a little more control with your tongue. And I don’t mean verbally. Change your makeout gameplan according to whatever he’s doing that’s got you so frustrated.

If he’s one of those people who opens his mouth really wide and basically eats your face, you should just mention it to him. It’s uncomfortable feeling like he’s going to literally suck your face off because he’s working his mouth like a Hoover.

I’m sure saliva isn’t the kind of uncomfortable swallowing you had in mind, so if he does get a little drool-y mid-make-out, keep your mouths shut a bit more. The key to a perfect kiss is knowing the right amount of tongue.

If he’s just an all-around snoozefest when it comes to puckering up, take some control and throw in a few extras. A little lip nibble never hurt anyone, and it can really steam things up if you do it right. Don’t bite too hard, though. Vampirism is only cute on TV and you don’t want to freak him out … unless he likes that.

If all else fails, you might just need to have a chat about how you two kiss. A little manipulation never hurt anyone, so mildly suggest something you like and then tell him it’s something you’d like to see him do. You could be the bad kisser in this relationship, so before blaming him, revisit that one night at sleepaway camp when your roomate taught you how to kiss. Your pillow won’t mind.

V

October 28, 2012

Reporters


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

Here is some impressive news for the University of Miami football program: All but one of the remain ...

Lonnie Walker IV stood out on and off the court at the NBA Draft Combine, which ended on Sunday in C ...

University of Miami incoming prep star Will Mallory, the other half of the soon-to-be No. 1 freshman ...

View photos as Miami Hurricanes Coach Jim Morris ends 41-year career on Saturday, May 19, 2018, at M ...

The sullen, charcoal sky opened with a vengeance Saturday afternoon at Mark Light Field in Coral Gab ...

A snapshot guide to the start of summer in and around UM. ...

Former investment banker Charmel Maynard leads UM’s investments and treasury functions. ...

Over his more than two decades at the U, the dean of students from 1976-1989 always put students fir ...

The final Sea Secrets lecture at the Rosenstiel School examines the biofluorescence of marine organi ...

Maintenance mechanic Milton Davis has kept UM housing humming for decades. ...

Sinead Lohan and Estela Perez-Somarriba of the Miami women's tennis team earned ITA Southeast R ...

Sophomore righthander Evan McKendry and freshman Freddy Zamora were among those recognized by the At ...

Senior Jeb Bargfeldt was recognized as ACC Pitcher of the Week following a dominating performance ag ...

No. 7 seed Miami opens its run at the 2018 ACC Baseball Championship Tuesday, May 22 against No. 11 ...

Although 17th-year head coach Paige Yaroshuk-Tews has made Sweet 16 appearances commonplace the jour ...

TMH Twitter
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.