Dear V

Dear V: Sexless but satisfied…

Dear V,

My friends always talk about which hot guys they’ve hooked up with recently, but it all seems so uninteresting. The idea of sex in general, I mean. Is there something wrong with me to think that when it seems so popular among other people? 


No Sex, Thanks


Dear Don’t Want the Dirty,

Sex is popular because it’s good, but that doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you.  Sexuality is a fluid concept, and it sounds like you might just be more on the asexual end of the spectrum. Absolutely nothing wrong with that!  And that’s coming from me, promoter of the horizontal mambo.

But just because something doesn’t interest you doesn’t mean you’re broken or anything.  Just put it in perspective.  A lot of people like hamburgers.  But if you don’t like hamburgers, whatever.

It’s who you are and trying to change that to fit in with all your friends is only going to make you unhappy.

You wouldn’t eat that hamburger if you hated it, right?  Just like you shouldn’t try to seem interested in sex if you’re honestly not.

Do you feel left out of conversation when your friends talk about it, though?  Because in that case, maybe just mention something to them.

As your friends, they shouldn’t judge, and then you guys can talk about things that you’re all interested in and enjoy, like the Jersey Shore.  Everyone loves Snooki, right?

I’m totally kidding, by the way.

You just need to get comfortable enough to say “I’m just not that interested in sex. Is it cool if we talk about something else?” and no one can tell you that something’s wrong with you.  Because they’re not you and they don’t know how you feel.  You can even snap your fingers in a z-formation while you say it, if that’ll empower you more.

So you do you, and don’t worry about “doing” anyone else.


October 14, 2012


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