V's Take

Dear V: I have the sexual experience of an elementary schooler

Dear V,

I’ve been flirting with a few guys recently and it’s made me think and worry. I’ve got pretty much the same amount of sexual experience as an elementary schooler at a playground. When the time comes, how do I tell the lucky guy this without feeling insecure and lame? There’s no way it won’t be awkward when we talk about past relationships and all.

Help!

Inexperienced and Insecure

Dear Inexperienced and Insecure,

It’s very refreshing to see that not everyone is slutting it up at our school. I’m glad you realize that you do not have to spread your legs and lower your morals to get someone to like you.

Now that I have gotten that off my chest let me assure you I am positive you are not the only sexually inexperienced person at UM. I know there is a big difference in not doing the deed and not doing anything at all, but, I mean, everyone has to cross those lines at some point in their lives.

With that being said, do not rush into things and possibly end up making rash decisions in the process. I’m glad to hear that you are mingling and getting your mojo fired up. Continue to play the field until that special someone catches your eye and is worth settling down for. You’re young and I’m sure you’re hot; don’t get tied down unless this dude is worth it.

As soon as you start to play the field I am sure you will find the guy that is in fact worth it. Why else would you be writing me? Do not be ashamed of your lack of sexual prowess. This guy must be pretty special, so he must be the kind of guy who won’t freak out when you tell him what’s up.

Don’t get too revealing and lay it all out on the table at once (i.e. telling a guy your whole sexual history in one sitting, whether you’re Mother Teresa or Kim Kardashian, is a major no-no). But I will say as weird as it may sound to you, guys sometimes like girls who have not previously been getting their grove on before. Yes, yes I know this sounds strange; we think of men wanting the sex goddesses. However, many guys like girls who are new to the gig because it eases the pressure on their performance and makes them think they can be excellent teachers. Warning: not all guys are excellent teachers.

The bottom line is if this guy is awesome enough for you to explore new things, then he will be pretty understanding of your situation. It may sound awkward to you when it comes out of your mouth, revealing your inexperience, but all he will be thinking is “score!” Be safe and have fun and stop being insecure with your lack of escapades.

With love,

V

Have a question for V? Hit up DearV@themiamihurricane.com.


February 2, 2011

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • HurricaneSports

It's almost summer, time for college football players to wind down and chill out — every now an ...

More than a decade after former University of Miami football star Sean Taylor was murdered during a ...

Lonnie Walker excelled on the court during the NBA Combine in Chicago last week. The potential lotte ...

Athlon Sports released its projections for the 2018 college football season Monday. The predictions ...

Here is some impressive news for the University of Miami football program: All but one of the remain ...

Voters head to the polls in a historic election to choose the country’s next president. ...

From boathouse to marine research powerhouse, the Rosenstiel School of Marine and Atmospheric Scienc ...

A snapshot guide to the start of summer in and around UM. ...

Former investment banker Charmel Maynard leads UM’s investments and treasury functions. ...

Over his more than two decades at the U, the dean of students from 1976-1989 always put students fir ...

For the 16th year in a row, the Miami women's tennis team ended the season ranked in the top 20 ...

Ranked and seeded third, Estela Perez-Somarriba of the Miami women's tennis team tallied a 6-3, ...

The Hurricanes will be in action at the 2018 NCAA East Preliminary, scheduled for May 24-26 at the U ...

Hurricanes' programs post strong APR marks once again. ...

No. 7 seed Hurricanes staged a late comeback to win their opening game at the 2018 ACC Championship, ...

TMH Twitter
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.