Dear V

Dear V: I just can’t get him out of my mind…

Dear V,

I was with my boyfriend  for six months- not very long but I was so in love with him and I still am. We did everything together and I was really happy, but then he dumped me.

He said he didn’t feel ready to go steady and wanted to break it off before he hurt me. It’s been three months since we broke up and I just can’t get him out of my head. I still love him. I don’t know what to do.

I’ve tried everything and it’s really bringing me down.

What should I do?

Sincerely,

Help Me!

Dear Help Me,

No matter how short the relationship, boys can be really hard to get over. Don’t think just because it was six months that you should be over your ex by now; these things take time and everyone is different in how they deal with heartbreak.

It seems as though this breakup was fairly sudden, another reason you may be having trouble forgetting about him. As much as people say the easiest way to move on is to find someone new, this may just be a good time to spend with yourself and your friends, building closer friendships.

Try to organize a fun night with the girls. You can all swear off men for the night and just have a good time without the stress and drama of the male race.  This may help you remember that it’s possible to have fun without boys, and that you’re better off without someone who doesn’t want to commit to you.

You said you were really happy with your boyfriend, but I’m sure there were some things that used to bug you. One way to keep you from thinking about all the good is focus on the bad. I’m not saying to make him out to be the bad guy, but simply writing down a few things that made you unhappy may help remind you why now you’re better off.

Carry this sheet around with you, and any time you start to miss him, read it to get those voices out of your head saying “I want you, I need you, oh baby, oh baby.”

I know it’s rough, but eventually things will get better. The most important thing is to stay positive;  there are many other fish in the sea and one day you’ll find one who would do anything to be with you.

Clearly this guy wasn’t the one, but don’t worry, he’s out there somewhere.

Stay Strong,

V

Have a question for V? Hit up DearV@themiamihurricane.com.


April 25, 2010

Reporters

The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami


ONE COMMENT ON THIS POST To “Dear V: I just can’t get him out of my mind…”

  1. Leigh says:

    This is horrible advise. Making a list that says what is bad about him/the relationship is far too horrendous. Honestly, the only thing that can help this poor girl is the support of her girlfriends and keep herself busy. DO NOT WRITE LIST OF THINGS THAT WERE BAD ABOUT HIM. Do not turn your hurt into anger. What if he wants to get back together at a later time? She shouldn’t then have to deal with pent up anger over this stupid list she’s made. It would hurt her more than help her. Making a list and causing anger that wasn’t there necessarily is silly.

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The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.