Dear V

Dear V: Some like it hot, some like it cold… but chunky?

The follow column contains explicit sexual content and may offend some readers.

Dear V,

I’ve been seeing this guy for two weeks now and last week we started having sex. Prior to having sex we discussed what turned us on. I have this thing about swallowing cum, like I really like doing it and he doesn’t mind because he likes to see me swallow his cum but here’s the problem. I’ve been swallowing since I was in my teens and I’ve never been surprised about what I swallowed, but his sperm is very different… different in a bad way. The consistency of his sperm is thicker than normal and the taste is just plain weird.

We have a great connection and the sex is great, but I feel that if I told him that I don’t want to swallow him anymore he might get suspicious and ask me why, especially after I professed that I love to do it so much. How do I break it to him  that his ejaculate is just plain weird? Is it normal for his sperm to be extremely chunky? Could there be something wrong with him if his sperm taste rotten?

Swallowing His Pride

Dear Swallowing His Pride,

Sounds like a sticky situation to me. First off, I would suggest you discuss it, because it sounds like you guys have a really great connection and you wouldn’t want this to hurt what you could have together. I think honesty is the best policy, and if he really likes you as much as it seems, I think he’ll understand.

Now onto the topic of normality. A common cause of this… texture you so speak of is dehydration. Tell you boy to drink up so you can drink up too! Other than this, however, the thickness is completely normal. It’s not the sign of an sexually transmitted disease, so there’s nothing serious to worry about.

Even still, I can see you’re not happy with the way things are going. I’d say just ask him about it and see if his love juice has always been this way, or if this is a recent change. If he really likes watching you, he’ll want to do anything to make it a more frequent occurrence.

Happy swallowing!

V

Have a question for V? Hit up DearV@themiamihurricane.com.

February 24, 2010

Reporters

V

Advice Columnist


ONE COMMENT ON THIS POST To “Dear V: Some like it hot, some like it cold… but chunky?”

  1. Lance says:

    Wow, how gullible are you, V?

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