you should let loose before saying ‘I do’.

Dear V,

I recently met a young man in whom I am interested in pursuing a relationship. The only problem is that I am presently in a long-term relationship with a guy that is wonderful to me. I know you are asking yourself why would I leave such a great guy to start something uncertain with a prospect!! The answer is pretty simple, he was my first real relationship and I am quite curious about other people. How do I know something is right if I have nothing to compare it with? I don’t want to tell either person since I don’t think either person would understand. Also, I don’t want my long-term boyfriend to start dating other girls, too. What should I do?

Stuck in a Groove

Dear Reader,

Something tells me that maybe you aren’t quite ready to let go of the great thing with your boyfriend that you currently have.

Unfortunately, if you wanted to date other people, he too would be able to date other people; having your cake and eating it too is a lot harder to fathom when there are two autonomous, hormonally driven people involved! If only the old green eyed monster weren’t an issue!

I do, however, understand your need to let loose a little bit. While I do know a few married and soon to be married couples who managed to seal the ultimate deal with their first significant others, they are far, far, far more the exception than the rule.

I am of the opinion that most people date around before finally settling on “the one,” but this is not to say that making that eternal commitment to your first serious partner is wrong or a bad thing because it isn’t at all. True, variety may be the spice of life, but you have some serious options to weigh if you happen to be very happy in your current mating state but feel the pull of temptation-will it be worth it?

On another serious note, if you do happen to undertake this mission and date the new guy, you must realize that honesty is of the utmost importance. Dating this new guy without your steady lover knowing would be committing a serious act of betrayal.

Likewise, it is not fair of you to keep your newest suitor in the dark about your relationship status, especially since his interest in you might not be quite as keen upon his discovery of your actual boyfriend. Then again, if the connection is strong enough and his interest in homewrecking is high, you might have an even messier situation on your hands.

Best of Luck!


Fact O’ the Day.The more older brothers a man has, the greater the chance that he will develop a homosexual sexual orientation.

Please send probing inquiries to DearV@hotmail.com or drop V a line in her box in the office of The Hurricane. All questions and comments will remain anonymous.

October 13, 2006


The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami

Around the Web
  • Miami Herald
  • UM News
  • Error

UM chatter: • One lesson learned in recent years, as one UM official put it: Don’t get your hopes up ...

The unopened Christmas gift that University of Miami defensive coordinator Manny Diaz recently spoke ...

Joseph Yearby declared early for the NFL draft. Gus Edwards transferred to Rutgers. Trayone Gray is ...

The University of Miami is in conversations about playing the University of Alabama to kick off the ...

He’s all grown up. Yet University of Miami defensive end Scott Patchan is only 20. Two reconstructiv ...

University of Miami students and researchers are blogging during a month-long expedition in the Gulf ...

María de Lourdes Dieck-Assad, a world-renowned economist and former ambassador, fills a new role for ...

Through the U Dreamers Grant, DACA students find essential support as they pursue their college degr ...

UM students talk about their internships up north in a city that never sleeps. ...

Former University of Miami Dean of Students William W. ‘Bill’ Sandler, Jr. passed away on August 6 a ...

RSS Error: A feed could not be found at http://www.hurricanesports.com/. A feed with an invalid mime type may fall victim to this error, or SimplePie was unable to auto-discover it.. Use force_feed() if you are certain this URL is a real feed.

TMH Twitter Feed
About TMH

The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly on Thursdays during the regular academic year.