Play hard to get…but not impossible to catch

Dear V,

Is it worthwhile to play “hard to get” from a girl’s perspective? I am nervous to try this flirting/dating technique because I’ve never done it before. What is the best way to do it?


Dear Reader,

As I’ve been able to ascertain from your signature, I think that you at least know what it means to play “hard to get,” which is certainly half the battle of playing.

In regards to your first question: yes, I absolutely think that it is worthwhile for a girl to play hard to get, however, there is a fine line between playing hard to get and being perceived as uninterested, or worse, as an ice queen. Though this may sound like I’m visiting you from 1950, men do not like women who make themselves too available because they are driven to win; they like a challenge, and the greater the challenge, the more precious the prize.

Before you begin to write your refutation letters to me, think about the principle of scarcity – anything of a limited availability will be assumed to be far more valuable and have a far greater worth than something you can pick up at any old corner. This being said, you can see why it would make sense to play hard to get.

Furthermore, I think that treating all your suitors with a little distance will help you differentiate between those who want you and those who just want to do you.

As for the best strategies to pursue, I don’t think that there is one way to play hard to get that is better than any other. Perhaps, if you’ve spent two nights in a row hanging out with a new date, it might be a good idea to turn down the next night’s date – let’s remember, you have your own wonderful life to maintain. Don’t forget, though, that playing hard to get does not mean that you get to be nasty to a poor boy as (God forbid!) he might mistake your playful apathy for downright disinterest.

Best of Luck!

Fact O’ the Day.According to the results of a Brazilian study, men who consume coffee have speedier swimmers (i.e. sperm with a greater motility) than men who refrain from coffee drinking.

Please send probing inquiries to DearV@hotmail.com or drop V a line in her box in the office of The Hurricane. All questions and comments will remain anonymous.

October 10, 2006


The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami

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The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly on Thursdays during the regular academic year.