stuck in the mud? don’t let breakups stall your love life

Dear V,

I’ve just gone through a horrendous breakup with my boyfriend. We were together for six months, and honestly, I loved every single minute of it. It has been two weeks since we’ve broken up, and I honestly don’t know if I’ll ever get over him. He, on the other hand, has had absolutely no problem with the breakup. He’s already dating other people. It’s like he completely forgot that I exist! I try not to call him, but I can’t help myself because he’s the only thing that I ever think about. I just can’t help it. I know that I need to move on, but I really don’t know if that is ever going to happen.

Dumped and Miserable

Dear Reader,

Even though it’s probably the last thing on your mind, the only solution for your problem is to move on and find someone new. I’m not saying that it’s not going to feel like you’re only going through the motions of dating because it probably will, but you must pick yourself up and try very, very hard to meet new people. Of course, everyone interprets their definition of “dating” differently. Am I advocating sleeping around to make yourself feel better? No, not at all. Do I think that you ought to try to make a genuine, emotional connection with someone new and (ideally) removed from your social circle? Yes, I absolutely think that would make you feel better. I am of the opinion that the most surefire way to get over an ex is to find a new love. Realistically, you could probably wallow in your sorrow forever. Why waste your life away crying when there is so much fun to found? Yeah, I don’t know why you would either.

As for calling and trying to contact your ex-boyfriend-just stop doing that right now. You’re not helping your own cause of trying to get over him by trying to hold on to what does not exist anymore. Clearly, his ship has sailed, and he has moved on.

Of course, it’s painful to realize that the love he used to have for you has reduced itself to nothing, but it has. Back away from any delusional thinking because your contact will not rekindle the romance, and really why would you want to date someone who doesn’t want anything to do with you? You are worth way more.

Best of Luck!


Fact O’ the Day.The largest scrotum on record had a diameter of approximately two feet.

Please send probing inquiries to DearV@hotmail.com or drop V a line in her box in the office of The Hurricane. All questions and comments will remain anonymous.

September 22, 2006


The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami

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The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly on Thursdays during the regular academic year.