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When a roommate’s sex life gets in the way

Dear V.,

I got a new roommate and have a problem with her sex life. She insists on having sex only when I am in the room. And, more often than not, I’m asked to rate her performance and that of her partner or provide other types of feedback. She has even approached me to videotape their act and/or to participate in their endeavors with my boyfriend. Needless to say, I am very uncomfortable with this situation. I have talked to my R.A. about this, and she told me to try to switch rooms but so far I have been unable to find another habitation. Please help! I don’t know how to handle this situation!

The Weirded-Out Roommate

Dear Reader,

Lordy, have pigs started to fly? I am shocked by your roommate’s weirdo behavior. Talk about the ultimate attention seeker! She has definitely taken kinky to a level that should not exist in the dormitories.

The only way that you’ll be able to beat her at this weird game is to indulge her desires on your own terms. Invite the entire floor to her sex show or seek out a really gnarly couple with which she and her boyfriend can do the dirty; I’m thinking old people, like grandpa old.

Ask your R.A. to speak to her. If she refuses, continue up the housing hierarchy until you find someone who will lecture your creepy roomie. Until then, hang tough, be thankful that she’s not into bondage (hopefully!), that you only have a few more weeks with her, and know that you aren’t the only one who is appalled by her sickening displays. Have faith in that what goes around comes around-karmic revenge is nasty.

V.

Dear V,

I have a crazy busy life and a boy that I’m in love with, I know he loves me too. Problem is that he has a girlfriend, someone that I know is more of a safety than anything else. Trust me. I am so torn between making excuses that I’m too busy to pay attention to him and the thought of stealing him back and away from his girlfriend. Should I wait until life calms down or should I add to the roller coaster and take him back?

Busy and lovesick

Dear Reader,

You’re completely sure that his girlfriend” is more of a safety than anything else?” Well aren’t you Captain Confident, stealing boys away from their girlfriends at your own whims.

You’ve gone a little loopy. You’re in denial about what isn’t happening between you and your infatuation. I have very mixed feelings about Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo’s He’s Just Not That into You, but you might want to get your hands on it because your scenario could be included. To put it kindly, if he wanted to be with you, he would be. You are intentionally making yourself miserable by living in the “what could be” realm of life. Get a hold of reality.

Instead of dwelling on what is never going to be, why don’t you paint the Grove red and find someone new? You’re confident-put the skill to good use! Learn how to make yourself happy without impeding on others’ territory, and you won’t have to worry about your rollercoaster of a life.

Best,

V.

Fact O’ The Day…According to a survey, 41 percent of men feel guilty for masturbating at least once a day, every day.

Please submit all questions, comments or concerns to DearV@hotmail.com or to the Dear V box in the offices of The Hurricane. All submissions are strictly confidential. Dear V. is published on Tuesdays and Fridays, and yes, V will respond to almost (don’t push it) anything.

April 29, 2005

Reporters

The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami


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The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly in print on Tuesdays during the regular academic year.