Dear V Risky Business: near hook-ups, bad dancers

Dear V,
I almost hooked up with my best guy friend last night, and it would have been amazing, except that his friend got sick before anything happened and he had to leave. I know he was mad that nothing happened because of how he slammed the door when he left, but I’m not sure we’ll have any new chances in the future, since at a party he was hanging out with his friends and I was hanging out with my friends, and he said he would call me after but he didn’t. I’m kind of confused and need some help.
Wanting to be more than just best friends

Dear Reader,
He is a friend. He said he would call. He didn’t. If I were to substitute the word “she” for “he,” would you still be this confused? Bingo. As a friend and only that, he really bears no higher obligation to you than those duties of a friend, and yes, sometimes friends do forget to return phone calls. But, don’t lose hope! You mentioned that he seemed upset with his friend because obviously, his friend got in the way of your business, which is a good sign. He could have chosen to politely say goodnight.
So, ask yourself this question: Do you want to bring this friendship to the next level? Because, I think that if you do, you can make it happen. He has shown interest in you both as a best friend and as kissy-friend. So, if you want it, do it silly!
Good luck!

Dear V,
I took this girl that I’ve had a crush on to one of my formals. We had a great time at the dance, I took her home, and then I never heard from her again. I know that I may not be the best of dancers, but I don’t understand why we haven’t chatted lately. What is this all supposed to mean?

Hello Jaded,
Maybe this girl didn’t go to the dance with you under the pretenses of anything more than friendship. Did you do something aggressive at the dance to scare her off? Were you sending off overt vibes of lust? Was your dancing not only bad, but also extremely offensive? (I’m just kidding!) Maybe you think that you had a great time, but perhaps her feelings are different.
Don’t judge her behavior post-dance and her lack of contact with you as anything more than what it was at the time. I would suggest calling her to catch up first. If things go ahead as planned, then try to rekindle the friendship before resorting to drastic measures a la negative thoughts and sketchy behavior.
Hope all is good.

Random Fact O’ the Day: The more sex you have, the more of it you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!

Please submit all questions, comments or concerns to DearV@hotmail.com or to the Dear V box in The Hurricane office. All submissions are strictly confidential. Dear V. is published on Tuesdays and Fridays, and yes, V will respond to almost (don’t push it) anything.

October 29, 2004


The Miami Hurricane

Student newspaper at the University of Miami

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The Miami Hurricane is the student newspaper of the University of Miami in Coral Gables, Fla. The newspaper is edited and produced by undergraduate students at UM and is published weekly on Thursdays during the regular academic year.